There are many ways that someone can express who they are. A person’s physical appearance is often one of those ways. The way you dress, the way you do your makeup, and the way you do your hair can all reflect the person you are whether you realize it or not. Until people get to know me and until I get over my anxiety, people assume I am a quite person who would much rather keep to myself than hold a fun conversation, but they are sadly mistaken. My husband and friends will be the first to tell you that I am the polar opposite of that and will talk your ear off once I get to know you.
Though I have always had a love for fashion and makeup those have never been the key ways I express myself. I have always expressed who I am with my hair. I have never been able to keep the same cut or color for long. In fact, I always do something drastic to my hair around the same time(s) every year. This year I told my husband to stop me if I try to cut my hair super short again. Although I can rock a pixie cut I am in love with a messy bun and my curls.
I have had my hair almost every color of the rainbow. I have had so many shades of blue, purple, and red in my hair it’s crazy. I was even nicknamed by a friend of mine from bible college “J-Unicorn” (pronounced: june-icorn) because my hair reminded him of a unicorn. As I stated in earlier in this post my battle with anxiety keeps me from being able to open up and have a conversation with people… in fact anxiety mixed with the exhaustion of motherhood often give me the dreaded, resting *BLEEP* face, and I hate it. People often find it easier to approach me when I have bright colored hair, I guess that’s why.
Once Joshua was born, as many of you know, I was neck deep in postpartum depression so I stopped taking care of myself. My long, beautiful hair spent 24/7 in a bun. I even began sleeping in a bun because I could not muster up the strength to take it out. Keeping my hair in a bun for that long damaged it beyond the point of repair so I had no other option than to just chop it all off. At the time that is what I needed, but when I started to wake up from the motherhood haze I began to miss my fun hair. I began to feel like a part of me was missing… dramatic I know but it’s true.
Dying my hair fun colors is my way of saying, “Hey World, here I am!” because I struggle to get those words out on my own. Dying my hair a fun color is the self care that has the best affect on me. My confidence levels are always boosted. As a people pleaser it is so easy to let the fear of rejection and of judgement control my life, but my hair is the one thing that I won’t let people control. Whether people like it or think it is outrageous that a mother would dye her hair an unnatural color *gasps*, my hair is how I express who I am.
How do you express who you are? I’d love to hear in the comments. If this post relates to you and you feel someone you know would enjoy it send it there way or share it on Facebook!
As Always Keep Smiling,
Jennifer
