• Motherhood,  Postpartum Mental Health,  Uncategorized

    Dealing With Mom Guilt | My Personal Struggle With Mom Guilt As A Stay At Home Mom

    It has been one year since I held my son for the first time and the mom guilt is beginning to sink in. I feel guilty for feelings and situations that I had no control over. I was robbed of the first six months of my son’s life, the squishy stage as I like to call it. Those months are all a blur to me and it hurts. It hurts only having pictures and stories of my son’s birth but very little memory of what happened while I was in the hospital. It hurts not remembering the first time he rolled over. It hurts only remembering the pain and exhaustion that overtook my body those first months. It hurts seeing the pictures and how much he has grown but only recalling memories from six months old until now, and even in that time frame some memories are a blur.

    If you were to ask me about those first months of my sons life I would describe them in these four words, angry, frustrated, scared, and tired. 

  • Uncategorized

    Goals For 2017!

    2016 is behind us and 2017 is here! A new year to achieve new things and let the old things go! Last year I started The Brock Blog with no clue how many people it would reach, this year I want to reach more. One way to set yourself up for success is to set goals, so here are my main goals for 2017!!

    1.Become more CONSISTENT at everything.
    One of my greatest struggles is being consistent. For 2016 it was my goal to post on my blog at least once a month, but for 2017 I am wanting to post more on scheduled days so my readers know when to click my way!

    2.Be more ORGANIZED
    This goal kind of goes hand in hand with goal #1 but I am determined to be more organized. I have tried making memos in my phone and Post-it notes but for 2017 I have decided  to try a planner! STARTplanner has helped me so much already keep track of special occasions and different due dates! Being organized means I will be on a strict schedule and in the end become more consistent!

    3.Hit 1k (1,000) followers on Instagram!
    Instagram is my favorite social media app out there! It’s easy to keep up with my favorite blogger and some of my best friends! When I started my blogging journey at the beginning of 2016 I had maybe 100 followers but now I am up to almost 500, it is my goal for 2017 to organically double that and post great content for my followers!

    4.Learn to balance PARENTHOOD, MARRIAGE, and WORK!
    Blogging is my job. Even though I work at home balancing the three things mentioned above is hard. My husband work 40+ hours, I am trying to become better at my job, and my son will be one in March. It would be so easy for me to neglect my blog so that I could spend time with my son and my husband but seeing other blogger’s success shows that there is such thing as a healthy balance and it is my goal to learn how to do it!

    5.By the end of 2017 I want to have my own Domain
    This is honestly my biggest goal for 2017. There are so many things that I want to be able to support my blog and have my own domain! I feel like with that comes so many more opportunities to branch out as well as bring in some income for my family as well as be found easier on sites like google and yahoo.

    6.Be a better mom
    This is a goal that I will have every day of every year. Momming is hard and some times I break easier than I should. For 2017 I want to be the best I can be for my son. I want to yell less, zone out less, and go numb less. He deserves me at my best and that is what I will do my best to be!

    What are some of your goals to reach for 2017? Let me know in the comments below what you wish to achieve!

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  • Uncategorized

    Farewell 2016, A Look into the Past Year of My Life

    2016 was a wild year. Things kept coming out of nowhere. I went into the year an 18 year old, pregnant bible school student and ended it a 19 year old, blogging mom. This past year was definitely not what I was expecting one bit. Within the first few weeks my life changed drastically. I had to drop out of school, move back to where I met my husband, and prepare for a our son’s arrival.

    This whole momming thing is not easy but it is worth it. Looking back 2016 kept me on my toes. I never thought in a million years I would be where I am today. After my son was born I was extremely depressed, even suicidal. Everyone kept telling me, “You’ll be fine, it’ll pass, it’s just the Baby Blues!” when in fact it was something that wouldn’t pass easily. I had severe postpartum depression. I had my good days but for every good day it seemed I would have twice as many bad, so I started writing.

    In 2016 my love for writing began to bloom again. It became the therapy I needed to get better and in the long run will help others know they are not alone! 10 months after it hit, Postpartum Mental Illness is still an ongoing battle, but I see the light of day more.

    My writing went from just my mom reading it to being read not only all over the United States, but people from over 36 different countries have clicked my way. I am so thankful for all the support that I have received over this past year! I really could not have done this without any of my lovely readers or the help of other bloggers that I have grown to admire through social media.

    I have little to no idea what the future holds for The Brock Blog, or even my family, but what I do know is whatever happens it will keep me on my toes. 2017 here I come!!!!!

    How did 2016 treat you? Let me know in the comments below!

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  • Postpartum Mental Health,  Uncategorized

    Connection Error: Being Disconnected to the Best Thing in Your Life

    Loving a child comes so effortlessly and easily to most women, but there are those select few who have to give it they have. I have learned that those select few are more than I first thought. From the way it seems more mothers deal with some sort of postpartum mental illness than those who don’t.