Inspiring people to thrive in life
If you are the mom who hasn’t washed your hair in 2 weeks, this is for you. If you are the mom who hasn’t eaten today or has had too much to eat, this is for you. If you are the mom with the moody toddler who just want to yell and scream, this is for you. If you are a mom who is just… struggling, this is for you.
I see you. I understand what you are feeling.
I am a young mom, a modern mom with an alternative style. I’ve always been a bit out there with my looks and haven’t really been one to conform to societies norm when it comes to my style. That being said, if looks could kill I’d be one dead mom. . To be honest, I probably wouldn’t have made it out my pregnancy alive. Crazy hair, tattoos, piercings, and stretched ears… that is what you would see if you looked at me. We live in a world full of people who define your capability of being a mother on what you look like. If you don’t look like the cookie cutter mom with the mini van and the stereotypical blonde mom bob then people see you as a danger.
Recently Netflix came out with a new show that is taking the world by storm. That show is 13 Reasons Why. It seems that you can’t log on to Facebook or Twitter without someone posting status after status about the show. Before I start explaining to you my experience watching this show I want to let you know that this post mentions suicide, rape, self harm, substance abuse, and mental illness. If these subjects are hard for you to handle please PROCEED WITH CAUTION.
It has been one year since I held my son for the first time and the mom guilt is beginning to sink in. I feel guilty for feelings and situations that I had no control over. I was robbed of the first six months of my son’s life, the squishy stage as I like to call it. Those months are all a blur to me and it hurts. It hurts only having pictures and stories of my son’s birth but very little memory of what happened while I was in the hospital. It hurts not remembering the first time he rolled over. It hurts only remembering the pain and exhaustion that overtook my body those first months. It hurts seeing the pictures and how much he has grown but only recalling memories from six months old until now, and even in that time frame some memories are a blur.
If you were to ask me about those first months of my sons life I would describe them in these four words, angry, frustrated, scared, and tired.
